21st
![LOL, Douchebags
Originally published: May 12, 2009
Douchebag of the Week (May 2-8)
That’s Tampa Bay Ray Johnny Gomes there with his fist raised in a game last year against the Boston Red Sox. Ironically, he was the designated hitter that day—a position adopted by the American League in 1973 to generate more offense in games and inflate the league’s batting average by comparison to the National League, where the game is actually played like it’s supposed to be played and the nine guys on the field are the same nine guys that appear at the plate.
Enter Chicago Tribune baseball “expert” Phil Rogers, whose past work earned him occasional infamy over at the late, great Fire Joe Morgan. Clearly hurting for new incoming mail, Phil boldly titled his May 4 column, “Common sense calls: DH in NL too.”
The mere suggestion of making the already controversial rule a universal one is douche-worthy enough (we imagine that many clearer-minded Tumblrs could poke infinite holes in that idea, but we still feel Earl Weaver put it best about the Baltimore Orioles’ first designated hitter, Terry Crowley, in his legendary “Manager’s Corner” interview). Remember that in 2004, an economist and a mathematician found the DH to be a “moral hazard” in how the rule actually encourages pitchers to exhibit truly douche-like behavior by being able to throw at batters without any fear of retaliation.
But that’s all irrelevant to Rogers:
Every time a pitcher takes the field, he’s an accident waiting to happen. The risks inherent in pitching are huge. It’s silly to increase those risks to increase the ones that hitters and baserunners face, especially when so much of a team’s payroll and its hope for success is tied into the arms of those pitchers.
Well, that certainly is an odd bit of twisted logic from Rogers. Oh sure, that statement can sound somewhat reasonable to someone like, say, George Will.
Admittedly, Rogers pointed out that his idea was unpopular (4-to-1 against it) in his follow-up column today. But nowhere in the published responses will you find mention of the fact that just this past March, it was Phil Rogers who was the guy waving the American flag and doing a bit of cheerleading when he reported “U.S. players are having a great time in World Baseball Classic”:
Chipper Jones could have caught the first flight back to the Atlanta Braves’ complex in Florida. He didn’t.A day after straining a muscle in his side, Jones spent Monday hanging out with his Team USA teammates. “You couldn’t get me away from here with a crowbar,” he said.Consider that a ringing endorsement for the World Baseball Classic, at least when things are going as well as they are for these guys.
Of course, a week later, Rogers had to report that indeed “Injuries riddle Team USA in World Baseball Classic” and still try to defend his stance that players already contractually obligated to perform in a 162-game season should also go play in a still meaningless global exhibition:
[Team USA Manager Davey] Johnson knows the run of injuries will be used as proof of the folly of the event, which has been popular throughout the world but hasn’t caught on with many fans of major-league teams and some front offices.
You know what else is a folly? The ever-continuing contradictory logic of Phil Rogers (“Pitchers should play all year … but never bat!”), who could just as easily title his next column, “Common sense calls: I’m a douchebag.”](http://25.media.tumblr.com/0pxU5aMGanev1w3yvlPSmHPeo1_400.jpg)
Originally published: May 12, 2009
Douchebag of the Week (May 2-8)
That’s Tampa Bay Ray Johnny Gomes there with his fist raised in a game last year against the Boston Red Sox. Ironically, he was the designated hitter that day—a position adopted by the American League in 1973 to generate more offense in games and inflate the league’s batting average by comparison to the National League, where the game is actually played like it’s supposed to be played and the nine guys on the field are the same nine guys that appear at the plate.
Enter Chicago Tribune baseball “expert” Phil Rogers, whose past work earned him occasional infamy over at the late, great Fire Joe Morgan. Clearly hurting for new incoming mail, Phil boldly titled his May 4 column, “Common sense calls: DH in NL too.”
The mere suggestion of making the already controversial rule a universal one is douche-worthy enough (we imagine that many clearer-minded Tumblrs could poke infinite holes in that idea, but we still feel Earl Weaver put it best about the Baltimore Orioles’ first designated hitter, Terry Crowley, in his legendary “Manager’s Corner” interview). Remember that in 2004, an economist and a mathematician found the DH to be a “moral hazard” in how the rule actually encourages pitchers to exhibit truly douche-like behavior by being able to throw at batters without any fear of retaliation.
But that’s all irrelevant to Rogers:
Every time a pitcher takes the field, he’s an accident waiting to happen. The risks inherent in pitching are huge. It’s silly to increase those risks to increase the ones that hitters and baserunners face, especially when so much of a team’s payroll and its hope for success is tied into the arms of those pitchers.
Well, that certainly is an odd bit of twisted logic from Rogers. Oh sure, that statement can sound somewhat reasonable to someone like, say, George Will.
Admittedly, Rogers pointed out that his idea was unpopular (4-to-1 against it) in his follow-up column today. But nowhere in the published responses will you find mention of the fact that just this past March, it was Phil Rogers who was the guy waving the American flag and doing a bit of cheerleading when he reported “U.S. players are having a great time in World Baseball Classic”:
Chipper Jones could have caught the first flight back to the Atlanta Braves’ complex in Florida. He didn’t.
A day after straining a muscle in his side, Jones spent Monday hanging out with his Team USA teammates. “You couldn’t get me away from here with a crowbar,” he said.
Consider that a ringing endorsement for the World Baseball Classic, at least when things are going as well as they are for these guys.
Of course, a week later, Rogers had to report that indeed “Injuries riddle Team USA in World Baseball Classic” and still try to defend his stance that players already contractually obligated to perform in a 162-game season should also go play in a still meaningless global exhibition:
[Team USA Manager Davey] Johnson knows the run of injuries will be used as proof of the folly of the event, which has been popular throughout the world but hasn’t caught on with many fans of major-league teams and some front offices.
You know what else is a folly? The ever-continuing contradictory logic of Phil Rogers (“Pitchers should play all year … but never bat!”), who could just as easily title his next column, “Common sense calls: I’m a douchebag.”
